a question and answer forum.....for the time being. All things change and become something else if there is growth even Olde Baggs.

Sunday, August 18, 2013

What is a friend????

Someone who knows you well, relates to you, understands you and accepts who you are, just the way you are.

Someone who when you are in distress doesn't push for details but is willing to listen when you are ready to share.

Someone who asks you for something and you don't even hesitate but just do it because you know they wouldn't be asking if it were not important.

Someone you know is there for you.

this photo is titled 4 Queens and a Jack
I have in my life had lots of acquaintances and a few friends. None more than here in the blogosphere. I believe that is because we are more likely to read between the lines of blogs and after awhile you just know who someone is. The essence of the heart. The dirt under the fingernails. The passion of the soul.

If I had been asked who I was 5 years ago, I would have said a woman who was independent, crusty, directed and had no ties other than Sweet Man. And I didn't have many friends with whom I shared my life. If I wanted to can jam for days on end, I would. If I had a hankering to go to wherever, I went. If I wanted to sew for a month and never clean up the mess, I did. I was a bit of a hermit....not that that has changed all that much. I still like my own company better than most. But I am directed differently now.

Lots of situations have changed in the past 5 years. I started blogging, my daughter and grands moved in with us, I have reacquainted myself with life and living and I have many friends. All of these things have put me in a much better place mentally, physically, emotionally and most especially spiritually. It is hard to be selfish when you care about other people. It makes you bend, readjust, position and yield to what is shared.

There may be times when I sound like I am longing to be alone....and that is the case someties. But there are many more times when I know I have it good, just the way things are. Filled with love, laughter and others to care for, my life is full. I am blessed and today I needed to say so.

So to all of you who are my friends, thank you. For those who I don't know well yet......I think of you as "friends in waiting". For those that share my heart, I love you and owe you my fidelity and gratitude.


  1. I hear you on the build up of good friends through blogging, just wish you all lived nearby!


    1. There are so many times, I think I bet I could learn a thing or thousand from a very talented fabrication artist such as yourself. I wish I lived closer as well. Oma Linda

  2. It strikes me that you are a person who knows the value of what you have. This is a gift because so many people don't appreciate the gifts they've been given and pass on the realization that they've been happy all along without realizing it. Take care.

    1. Well thank you for the compliment. It hasn't always been something I knew, but as I have aged (and quite nicely I'd wager) I have trusted my gut more and the world less and now I know how blessed I am. You're really a goodie Stephen, Oma Linda

  3. Hello, Oma Linda, I found your post to be so beautiful that I cried. I do have people who are my friends that I see off and on throughout the year, some are family, some are people I've met through various other avenues, and then I have my blog friends and acquaintances. I wish I had the better understanding on how to make and keep friends, but that is often difficult for me to do so successfully. My closest friends are my husband and son and then it branches out from there to my sister and mother and someone whom I met through an awareness group and who totally changed my life by helping me to help others on the Spectrum and by helping those not on the spectrum understand better those on it. I think it is such a wonderful blessing to have all these people in my life, even though I may not have the best ability to be as actively involved in some of their lives as they would like our friendship to be due to sensory issues and other such things. I do feel very happy and lucky that I count you as one of my blog friends. Thank you for sharing this today. Thank you for your friendship as well. Blessings, Bird

  4. What an utterly sweet and lovely post, Linda. You are a true gem.

  5. I like that phrase Linda - "Friends in waiting" - I remember having a long talk with my Mom one day and she said how lonely she was, for almost all her "Friends" had passed away. She had a wonderful life, was loved by all and had at least two handfuls of friends - true friends gained over a lifetime of collection. She had just recently lost her life long "bestest" pal, friend, etc.etc. I had mentioned at one point that there were others like her that had also lost that "special dear friend" and perhaps she should start making some new friends, for its never too late in your life to make new friends - that to me would be like a missed opportunity or the "road never walked on". I had a dear friend that was my Mom's age - and much like my Mom, she had lost her friends that had passed away or in Nursing Homes. I invited my friend to drive down to stay overnight for a visit and asked her if she would mind picking up my Mom and bring her with her. Great. The friendship began that day and for the next 10 years they enjoyed some wild adventures carousing about the countryside and for 10 years, they got to do just that - trust me - there were great adventures :) They both got sick within six weeks of each other (almost 90) and my Mom passed away - Her friend did come to visit at hospital, right to the end and is now in stages of Alzheimer's and sort of remembers my Mom. Yes, we do visit her. My point in (sorry) this long note, is that its never too late to bring some new people into your life and call them "friends in waiting". I loved this post and you are right to trust your gut more and the world less - I agree with that. Have a wonderful day and I apologize for the rather large paragraph.

  6. A very uplifting post, thanks, I needed that!

  7. How great my Lindy that my journey back into the Land of Blog begins with you.
    You know that you have my heart always.
    BFF :o)he he he

  8. I love you Oma Linda! You are one special lady in my heart! I am always talking to mom about you!! Big Hugs ;o)

  9. I have to admit, I could have written this post...it sounds like me...always glad to make a new friend I say this...congrats on the Post of the Week...I understand completely why it was chosen...

  10. "Someone who knows you well, relates to you, understands you and accepts who you are, just the way you are." These words are the crux of this loving, thoughtful, honest post for me.This is one of the greatest gifts we can give and receive in this life. For someone to truly love and accept you, warts and all. It's not easy and I have lost many friends who, when they discovered the real me, were horrified and ran away. But I have also found others that I cherish more than anything in this life, who I am not able to frighten. They stand, with open arms, concern, warmth, and unconditional love- even when I beat my hands against their chests and challenge them by yelling and screaming. "Nope", they say, "No matter what, I still love you..always will. So sit down and let's have a cup of tea."
    And as I have aged, I have found that I am able to love fuller and not be so judgemental as I was when I was younger. I had high expectations and was usually let down when they were not met as I had imagined. I have always tried to have empathy but now that I am older and understand better, I try to give all my understanding with no strings attached. I want to be a good friend. Thank-you, Gnoma for this lovely, special Post. XOXOXOXOOXOXOOXOXO

  11. A most awesome post! I too have gained so much in my world through bloggy connections with lovely folks such as your wonderful self.
    Have a great day.
    Always, Queenie

  12. I'm here from Hilary's POTW selection.
    What an amazing post and it's so encouraging to me.
    Friends in Waiting...love it.
    I agree that it is "hard to be selfish when you care for others."

  13. My favorite too: "It is hard to be selfish when you care about other people." That is very well-put, and this is a wonderful post.

    Glad I stopped by from Hilary's blog:)


You are always welcome to comment on my thoughts and I love them all......