a question and answer forum.....for the time being. All things change and become something else if there is growth even Olde Baggs.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

It's been too civil around here................

From time to time I have let my "real" feelings be known at this particular venue. And tonight is going to be one of those times.

I have, as you all know, been married to the same man for much more than half my life. Almost 40 years truth be told. And in all that time, I have never really understood him. I love him, I have fun with him, I treasure the fact that he has put up with my shenanigans for all these years, but I don't understand him.

He sees life through testosterone colored glasses. Emotions, pain, reality and life are all viewed as separate and not equal portions of his pie. In his realm the phrase, "I just want you to be happy" is frequently offered as solise to my bruised or petulant feelings. He gets round to it, pretty much when I make a big deal out of something and not one day off sooner. I have only seen him really, really mad 8 times in all these years. The rest of the time he pretty much is in neutral.

I, on the other hand probably have 8 fits a day and haven't seen neutral in ions. I worry for him and his lack of venting. Oh he talks about disturbances in the "force" but never really says how he feels about it. And conversely, I don't have a govenor on my mouth when it comes to how I feel.

But I almost peed my pants this morning when the man formerly known as Sweet Man, now named Mister Oblivious, with a perfectly straight and honest face says to me, "hey babe, who is Kate Middleton? I know I should know the name but I just can't place it." At first I thought he was being his snarky self, then I thought there would be a punch line, and then I was seriously scared. Did he really not know the Bride to be this weekend? Has he not been awake in the past, oh I don't know, 3 months at least?

And then I started laughing, at which point he was a little upset with me. He had asked a question and I was blowing him off with laughter. When I did tell him who she was, he paused and said, "OMG, I knew I knew her from somewhere." Then I really lost it.

But as the day has progressed, I'm not so sure it's funny. He is grumpy, moody, preoccupied and surly. That's not Mister Oblivious, it's not Sweet Man. I don't know who this is but he's scaring me a little.


  1. LMAO I am sorry dear one for laughing but my kids said the same thing...boys of all ages are just dumb or don't care.
    I can't believe I am helping Faith move out of my new apartment in a few short hours and I was wide awake at the horrible hour of 2am! So I am watching the wedding stuff I had no plans on watching inbetween STILL EFFING PACKING
    sorry for venting, I am sure SM will be back soon... xoxox Bright Blessins

  2. Good morning Linda. When I read this the first time I grinned and thought, "Isn't that just like a man?" Then I thought about it and am not so sure if I'd be worried if I were you. I think I'm probably a bit older than you and Sweet Man, and I've come to a point in my life where I think I might be out of it at least part of the time. It's nothing to be too concerned about, at least I......what was I saying?

  3. Since it is on this blog - when I read the title my first thought was "And this is a bad thing how?"

    I was actually a little disappointed that it wasn't about the other.

    For what it is worth Pooldad "Tim Gunn"ed the heck out of that dress. He is soooo savvy. giggle

  4. Has he had a physical lately? Sometimes underlying health problems can come out in personality issues.

    Or have you said the last two statements *to* him? Maybe something is bothering him and he's trying to protect you from it.


  5. Oh dear. I'm with the sage Mrs B on this one, perhaps there's something in there that he's worried about hurting you with.

    My Joe is also a bit of a clam with his feelings and as such I would be concerned if my laughter at what I thought was an attempt at snark moved him into a foul mood. Try talking to him maybe, but tread lightly. *hugs*

  6. All I know is that I wish I didn't know the name of Kate Middleton, now not to put anyone down for wanting to watch all the festivities but I am so glad they are married and the news can move on.

  7. I'd be happy to not know who she is. I'm no more interested in their wedding than I am in any other strangers' wedding.

  8. I'm not sure what to think, my sweet friend. But if you are at all concerned, you take that Sweet Oblivious Man's hand, sit him down and have a heart to heart. Your love means too much to be kept silent.

  9. I agree with Mina on this one...I can just see you laughing, you remind me of me. your sweet oblivious man sounds a lot like my hubby. so laid back and relaxed usually....I saw him kick a cabinet outside on the weekend and it broke...it had warped over the weekend. I said to him as I passed by him. If there is anything else you would like to kick maybe get it over with while I am in the house. It was so out of character for him that I could not help laughing....I think I infuriate him when I don't go oh honey whats wrong....silly sod, he just about fell. lol. we just keep loving them Linda. hugs to you.

  10. The word that just came up when I was commenting was perbogr....is that like poor buggar...just saying. take care. lol.

  11. Well, I can actually see how that could happen because not everyone is as involved with Royalty and not everyone pays attention to the news all the time...(like me) and if it weren't all over the media all day, I may have missed her name too ...he just has different priorities. I never understood men and don't have to as I am not married ;-) But, it's amusing trying to figure them out.


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