Many years ago when I was recruiting folks to do volunteer work, I had a very hard lesson to learn. There were going to be a whole lot of no's to the requests that I posted to folks. And if I was going to be a successful volunteer coordinator, I had to market my event well and then be prepared for letting the person's heart answer the question.
I worked with other volunteer coordinators and saw many take the no's they got as either personal slight or as a challenge to them to get the person to change their mind and say yes. The older woman I worked most closely with had been in her position as director for many, many years. She was laid back, easy going and made sure that each one of her staff knew two things......1. that they could get the events staffed and 2. that a no was as holy as a yes.
In other words, allowing the person you're asking the question to be honored even if they aren't giving you the answer you want. That lesson has served me well, lo all these years later. I can't take a negative as a personal attact nor do I have to make the other person feel bad if they can't complete a task. Life gets in the way and that is all there is to it.
Nowadays, I have been asked to do things that I either couldn't or chose not to do and I have given my holy no. It is interesting to see how others digest that answer. And I think it tells a lot about someone's self confidence in the way they deal with the no. I also have been afforded the opportunity to receive some no's and I hope I have lived up to Ms. Upton's benchmark when I say, thank you for telling me your truth maybe next time we'll get to work together.
So the next time someone says no to something you offer to them, be blessed by the fact they even considered whatever opportunity you are offered them. And take the answer whether in the negative or affirmative as how they need, want or have to respond. It makes sharing the planet with others, oh so much easier to handle.
I worked on this very issue last night at the dark of the moon. Someone I care for asked me to help. And now I have growth to the full moon to count on as the instrument to help make this so for someone else.......but they must want it as well.