I'm going to let you tell me what you think nostalgia is, especially at a time of year when we all look back and think how lovely things were.
Is it the feeling of comfort we gain from the familiar? Is it the persons, places or events now gone that we long for? Is it a fad, attitude or position that we once held but no longer hold so true?
I have had dreams, as of late, that entail long ago events albeit in a dreamlike way, that I would really rather leave in the past. But there is definitely something that I am being told by the reviewing of these events long gone. I just haven't had my awareness of the lesson plugged in yet. But it is interesting that while others long for the good old days, I would rather skip it all together.
There are not very many things in my personal history that I really, really would like to re visit, even on a happy trip down memory lane. Most memories have other appendages and baggage attached that lead to some not so pleasant thoughts. Don't get me wrong, I do have happy memories that I recall fondly.
But if I were to pick a time in my life when I am crystal clear that it was life changing and I needed to hold onto the memory as tight as I could for as long as I could..........drum roll.........it would be when I cursed myself by saying, "I'll never forget what it was like to be a kid", because as hard as I have tried, I have unfortunately forgotten so much.
As much energy as I put into holding on tight to that feeling of pre-pubescent angst........it has been washed by time, to a pale image of itself by so many happenings in life. But I am getting nostalgic for that time with a certain 11 year old girl child who is suffering so from being at "that age". I can muster some feelings when she decries the injustice of adults who "just don't understand". I can sympathize when she is awkward and unsure of herself in social situations and I can almost touch the joy of the newness of life situations that tickle her deep down inside her soul. She has so much life to be yet lived.
Did you breeze past this stage of childhood, or were you mired down by the changes and drama? Or like me are you unsure anymore of what it was really like?
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I wouldn't say I exactly breezed past it, more head down, charged like a bull past it ;o) Actually, that's been most of my life lol
ReplyDeletehmmm...don't really remember much of my childhood. I'm thinkin I'm more unsure. Here's what I've been mulling over. For years my husband and I camped...and in all sorts of weather, in all sorts of places. We did this for many, many years. The good times have seemed to blur, but the really awful times stand out like yesterday. I couldn't start to tell you about our wonderful camping trips, but I can tell you down to a gnat's ass about the bad ones. I've just started wondering if the rest of my memories are like this??? I've been studying Lojong. It's a Buddhist thing...anyway, one of the quotes/rules is, Treat everything you perceive as a dream...hmmm
ReplyDeleteI was reading through some of your older post and I seen where your kids call their grandparents Oma and my grandson Justice calls me that, and not because we asked him to it was one of his first words, we knew it meant grandna we just didn't know how he knew. Personaly I figured reincarnation. Bridgets Daughter
ReplyDeleteI remember many things, a lot I would like to forget. I'm not one to hold onto memories, as mine are usually attached to ones that are less pleasant as well. I keep forging ahead. When I do remember, I like to remember things like last year, or times not so far back that were wonderful and that illustrated the good changes in my life. I very rarely dig into the past and if I do I notice how bad it usually makes me feel
ReplyDeleteI'm all about feeling good now. Life is too short to do otherwise.
My sisters both seem to have better memories of childhood than I do. I can only remember bits and pieces like what it felt like to be racing down the sidewalk on my roller skates. What Turquoisemoon said about remembering the bad camping trips pretty much sums it up. The memories that seem to stick are the really bad ones. The other stuff just seems to fade away. I miss the time I had with my children and grands when they were small and precious and everything was new and a wonder for them.
ReplyDeleteI wish you and your wonderful family a happy and healthy new year. Hugs
Oh boy... 11. 11 was unbelievable for me. It was when I started my period. That was fun. Very young and hormones running amok. I was very moody and in a lot of pain a week out of every month. I was scared out of my marbles, because I didn't know what it was. No one had given me "the talk" yet. They thought I was too young to have anything like that happen. Mom came to the rescue of course. But my goodness, what trauma. I was so scared.
ReplyDeleteOf course, I have Asperger's Syndrome, so that made things so much more complicated for me. We didn't know I had it so no one understood what I was doing and why. Not even me a lot of the time.
"That age" was not an easy age nor was any age for me. I loved being a kid on Christmas, during the summer when I had not horrible school to be in, and I could spend my hours in the fields and woods and in my room doing my own things in peace and quiet. But I'm happy I'm grown up now. Never want to repeat a lot of my childhood or even early adulthood. I'm really with you on that.
Nostalgia? Hmmm... I only feel that way about my time with my son when he was growing up. I wish to get some of that back. That's why the Oogle drawings he did for me this Christmas were so incredible to me. That's nostalgia for me. To think back to those good times with my son, those times I'll never get again. It makes me cry and I wish we could go back in time sometimes. I'm not so good with change and growing up when it comes to my kid.
I hope you figure out your dreams and what they are telling you. It's hard to relive the past when it's painful. I totally understand that.
Bright blessings to you and yours on this New Year's Eve,
Bird
~i remember quite clear and have been sharing with one wee older one that i too was once there...have been there...done that...and in all honesty don't wish for my adolencent years to be...it is so hard...one wanting independence yet just unraveling their childhood skin...uugghh...they for some reason can not hear the words of one who is older...i guess that is when their minds are figuring out who and what they believe in and where they are trying to stand in life...
ReplyDeletei wish for you to let those dreams fade and peace and goodness fill your thoughts...you deserve just so...my dear...you have been nothing but a gift of light and love in my days and i share the same to you...
all my best in this coming year...i look forward to catching up...be well and much love light and blessings upon you and yours~
I remember much and not without fondness for some things, discomfort over others. I made that same promise to myself and tried (though often failed) to keep it when dealing with my own children's growth and development. Certain events and activities will plop me back 40+ years with ease - with mixed feelings. There's always those. But the best reason to revisit the mindset of our inner child is to spend time with a young-un, as you mentioned. Nothing brings that memory alive like that. Our nostalgia is their reality.
ReplyDeleteWishing you and yours a wonderful New Year.
Gosh, Linda, what a thoughtful post that has inspired thoughtful comments. Interesting--I want to say that I remember the best moments, but end up agreeing with most of your commenters that I remember the worst ones most clearly. I'm with Bird--I am most nostalgic about my time with my children when they were younger.
ReplyDeleteNow--I treasure every moment. Retirement is the best of all times, perhaps because it is tinged with the feeling that time is shorter than it has ever been for me.
Happy New Year to you--may it be hopeful and safe and sparkling with possibility!
Well, nostalgia just isn't what it used to be!! LOL My poor grandson, Sean, is like your girl, going through so many changes...poor things.
ReplyDeleteAs for me, I don't remember having any problems...oh yea, I got my first migraine at that age while I was in music class...the nun was over 6' and always told us tales about living in the country in TN and how she and her siblings would sit up on the barn looking for the revenuers....daddy was in the moon shine bidness!!! LOL We were studying Gregorian chant notes and I was struck by a raking light in my left eye and then it all went to crap. The principle called my mother and she said it was a migraine...told them to give me a couple of aspirin and put me in a dark room. They put me in a room which was a book storage...still remember the smell of those musty books and that dusty couch.
So how's that for nostalgia...every time I smell stinky books, I'm taken back to that moment in my 11th year of life.
Have a great New Year, lady friend.
Loves ya and the goats are ready to have some fun...got their party hats on!!
G
I think nostalgia is more a feeling for a space in time rather than any certain memory. Maybe I see a piece of lace that smells of lavender and am instantly reminded of my grandmother. The memory of her brings unconditional love, support, a connection to spirit. It does not bring any certain memory, but rather the essence of her. That is what nostalgia means to me.
ReplyDeleteChildhood was so long ago, wasn't it? Hmmm...11...I believe I wanted to wear make up and shave my legs and my mother said it was not yet my time. I thought she was the meanest, most unfair person ever. One day while she was gone my big sister secretly shaved my calves for me and I kept them hidden so neither of us would be caught. LOL. Now I find it to be the biggest pain in the ass ever. ;-)
Childhood was a difficult period. I have lovely parents, who tried to help me a lot, but certain things just couldn't be helped, luike being bullied for a large part of my youth. Feeling different all the time. Having Asperger, just like Bird, and not knowing has been hard. I always felt left out, didn't have a lot of friends and was an only child, so sometimes it was lonely.
ReplyDeleteI love being grown up and knowing what I know now. I wouldn't want to go back to my childhood.
Happy New Year !!!!
I tend to dash in and out of nostalgia land for precisely the fear of dwelling on those bits, pieces and chunks (some with sharp edges) that can drag a girl down. Yes, I too have fond memories and rememberances of wonderful folks to which I dash in and out for brief visits in bright colors to ward of being sucked into the blues.
ReplyDeleteAll that being said...
eh hem...(cough)... me me meeeeee...
Happy Centennial to New Mexico
Happy Centennial to New Mexico
Happy Centennial dear New Mexicoooooooo
Happy Centennial to the great state of New Mexicoooooo!
I did not know it was New Mexico's centennial too! *blushing bright red* But now I do :o)
Have a really great day.
Always, Queenie
Once you reach a 'certain age', it's very difficult to remember what it was like to be that young...you just have to listen to her...she'll remind you and perhaps then you'll remember also...let her vent to you...then hug her...
ReplyDelete