a question and answer forum.....for the time being. All things change and become something else if there is growth even Olde Baggs.

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

You knew I wasn't gonna be able to not rant one more time......

before the end of the year. Yes, you do know how I roll.

I went to the Dr. on Monday. Yep, got another lung thing going on. Darn. The appointment went very nicely, no complaints about the nurses, PA's or schedulers. Everyone was great and it also went very fast. But.....and you know I always have a but....gripe numero uno: I was reading an article in a parenting magazine while I waited and there was an article about how to be a "calm parent". Calm parents raise children who are calm. (It's that whole nuts not falling too far from the tree thing) Calm parents remove themselves from stressful situations (this does not mean go running into the night screaming), contemplate how to react to the infraction (without death and destruction being mentioned), misdeed, wrong doing. Then the calm parent talks to the child (offender) and let's them know how they went wrong and how they can correct the behavior. And the article went on to say that we all make mistakes and sometimes when a parent has handled a situation in an "un calm" (normal reaction)  manner, we have to learn to forgive ourselves. Yeah, that part I agree with as well as the part that said that parents must put their needs first in order not to be stressed more with child rearing.

Okay, on the written page and in my head, I get it. I worked with teenagers for 20+ years, they don't respond well to threats, anger, angst, crying and carrying on. I was required to take a number of hours of "be nice and don't get us sued" classes. But I'm sitting in the doctors office thinking ......big bubble of words above my head....that's fine if you are that kind of calm, collected, got all your stuff in one pile person to begin with. If you're not, it's great to aspire to not screaming at your kids when they paint hair remover on the cat. But conventional wisdom says, I might scream loud enough for folks in Texas to hear me. It is wonderful to have ethereal goals in life.....but well then there are the rest of us imperfect people who have been told repeatedly, we are imperfect and that's why we scream. So the vicious circle just keeps on turning. At this point, my grands would probably think that I was at death's door if I didn't have an animated and verbose response to a crisis.

The action, reaction, blame, guilt, sadness cycle is such a part of not having any power as a child. So there we are walking a tightrope to make sure our own children (grandchildren) are not impaired by our own histories. It is lofty and noble and hard and impossible sometimes. And for folks like me, articles like that are a trigger to thinking way too much and writing blogs about it.

2nd gripe: There was this pair of females in their 60's sitting across from me. The one was chatty cathy incarnate and the other couldn't get a word in sideways. The chatty one was looking through a magazine, telling the other one what she thought of everything in the magazine and licking her finger to help her turn every single page................and I'm thinking and how many other people have done the lick and turn thing in that magazine today, let alone since it was put in the waiting room with coughs and sneezes and all manner of goodness knows what. It was at that point I put the magazine I was reading down, looked in my purse and got out my bottle of antibacterial. eeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. That's just nasty ya'll.


  1. Hey so sorry you are having problems with your lungs. I just hate those articles for no one walks in your shoes or has your children. keep being animated...lol. as for the magazines, a great place for germs. I never touch them. some offices no longer put them out for those exact reasons....that would have grossed me out. I hope you had a nice Christmas, I did with my Mom, I wish you all the best in the New Year and hope your year is a healthy and happy one. I cherish our friendship Linda. feel better

  2. Gripe #1 about the article for "calm parents". Hmmmm, sounds like those parents are battery operated because I've never met a REAL DAMN PERSON who acts like that. I HATE those parenting magazines.

    Gripe #2 about the licky lady.....I'm gonna go take a bath in Purell now just thinking of it.

  3. The old saying "kids don't come with a manual" is a misnomer, obviously - we have the whole world telling us HOW to raise our kids.

    I have two words for everyone: common sense. ;D

    And that is just NASTY. I won't be touching another magazine again without gloves. ick. That's like licking your fingers at the dinner table. ewww

  4. We were at the hospital this evening with my father...had the family use the antibacterial hand stuff on the way out the door...

  5. LOL, I always think about people licking their fingers to turn pages in public places - YUCK!!!

  6. I hate having to go to the doctor or hospital - not so much for a cure, but for having to wait in the waiting room and catch more germs. I wash my hands when ever I can, especially after shopping, walking the dog - anytime really that I'm outside and especially grocery shopping - pushing those buggies and touching that nasty money - but somehow we survive ;-)

  7. Yeah, and that's why I bring my OWN magazines or my Kindle to the doctor's office these days!!

    You are such a smart chick doll. I love you. Really.

  8. You made me smile and that is hard to do at 3:30 am. Long story about why I am up so early and not a funny one either. I will never read another magazine, but I do carry purell with me everywhere. Get well!


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