a question and answer forum.....for the time being. All things change and become something else if there is growth even Olde Baggs.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

When the counselor needs counseling..............

I will forever be grateful to all the couselors, be they trained or born to be, who have saved my bacon. I owe a lot to these people who have listened, repeated so that I could hear my own words, recommended, let me figure it out, pointed me in a healthier direction, put me in a position to look in the mirror and see what I am and just plain put up with me. I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea. I appreciate the efforts of all who would help

and then there are those that have found it necessary to correct, coerce, control and condemn.

I am absolutely sure at this spot in the road in my life that I have seen almost every kind of therapist, good, bad, indifferent, concerned, committed and those that should be.

It isn't for myself that I am making any comments. I feel like I have come to the conclusions and acted upon my own needed cleansings. It is for the others that I love that I am stating this, my own opinion.

Sometimes, help isn't help if it has strings. Sometimes, comfort is not comfortable if it has a price other than monetary. Sometimes, when you know in your gut, that it just isn't worth the cost of your well being, that you have to shut that door and be open to another door opening. Doing that for yourself is one thing, it is an entirely different kettle of fish when it is for someone else.

What do you think? Isn't manipulation, manipulation no matter what? Isn't using someone for your own purposes inately wrong? Be it in a clinical setting or a life setting?

Standing idlely by and watching loved ones going through something you think you have the answer for but they are not in a place where they can hear or heed your advice is the most frustrating place in the world. The old rock and a hard place thing.

I will keep on "being there" and watch for the opening to advise when it is appropriate. I should like to think that that is the way to handle this situation. Telling someone what to do is not giving advice but dictating and I gave that T shirt away some time ago.


  1. I am the sculptor and the sculpture. The challenge is mine. Obviously I am the expert and a therapist can only provoke new thoughts, directions and may guide me there. The steps, the chipping away, I have to do myself. There is a reason why I am constantly tired, isn't there? ;-)

    The second quote made me smile as it is one of my favs!!!! Great minds think alike ;-)

    Reading your journey through the mental health system makes me worry about myself in 10 weeks time when I am moving from Germany to Virginia.

  2. I think you could not have said this any better. be well, and good luck. hugs.

  3. You are right, telling someone what to do is dictating...if my mother had done less of that, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have married my first husband just to spite her!

  4. You are a very wise old broad and I hope the opportunity comes to share your experience and wisdom in order to help those who need a bit of a hand.

    Hang in there!

    word vert: scent. Seriously? They gave me a real word?


You are always welcome to comment on my thoughts and I love them all......