It's been too civil around here................

From time to time I have let my "real" feelings be known at this particular venue. And tonight is going to be one of those times.

I have, as you all know, been married to the same man for much more than half my life. Almost 40 years truth be told. And in all that time, I have never really understood him. I love him, I have fun with him, I treasure the fact that he has put up with my shenanigans for all these years, but I don't understand him.

He sees life through testosterone colored glasses. Emotions, pain, reality and life are all viewed as separate and not equal portions of his pie. In his realm the phrase, "I just want you to be happy" is frequently offered as solise to my bruised or petulant feelings. He gets round to it, pretty much when I make a big deal out of something and not one day off sooner. I have only seen him really, really mad 8 times in all these years. The rest of the time he pretty much is in neutral.

I, on the other hand probably have 8 fits a day and haven't seen neutral in ions. I worry for him and his lack of venting. Oh he talks about disturbances in the "force" but never really says how he feels about it. And conversely, I don't have a govenor on my mouth when it comes to how I feel.

But I almost peed my pants this morning when the man formerly known as Sweet Man, now named Mister Oblivious, with a perfectly straight and honest face says to me, "hey babe, who is Kate Middleton? I know I should know the name but I just can't place it." At first I thought he was being his snarky self, then I thought there would be a punch line, and then I was seriously scared. Did he really not know the Bride to be this weekend? Has he not been awake in the past, oh I don't know, 3 months at least?

And then I started laughing, at which point he was a little upset with me. He had asked a question and I was blowing him off with laughter. When I did tell him who she was, he paused and said, "OMG, I knew I knew her from somewhere." Then I really lost it.

But as the day has progressed, I'm not so sure it's funny. He is grumpy, moody, preoccupied and surly. That's not Mister Oblivious, it's not Sweet Man. I don't know who this is but he's scaring me a little.

And we're off for lunch again.................

This time I was taken to lunch for Oma's birthday with her very good friend Ms. Mildred. This woman is such a delight to talk to and is my contemporary and so we had lots in common.

She and her Mother came here in the late 40's on Route 66 and traveled around the southwest and discovered a real passion for the tri cultures of the area. She is a walking encyclopedia concerning Mimbres pottery of the middle Rio Grande valley and is a gem.

She and Oma introduced me to a lovely place for breakfast and lunch. The name of the restaurant is Weck's and they have, even in this economy grown consistently. They now have 10 locations all over ABQ and Rio Rancho.

We all had a dish that is only served at Weck's called a Bowl o Papas which is hashbrowns with bacon, sausage and ham with all manner of goodies with an egg on top. I am pictured here with what the native refer to as Christmas on the side. Red and green chile.

Good food, good service, great company to visit with.

Ta, Ms Crone

What the heathens were up to on this Sunday...............

How funny is Ms. Baggs, she refused to join us for our Sunday doings. I think she had a prior engagement with another group of friends. Maybe she'll fill us in on Monday.

Well we are in process of making a nice dinner for Sweet Man when he gets home from work around 4pm. We're having baked ham, pineapple casserole from (Cordelia's Cauldron), homemade rolls, the necessary green vegetable of the season aspergrass as Shelley called it when she was little, and deviled eggs. I hate to call them that. They should be called, hmmmmmmm, creamed eggs on the half shell, nah, smashed yellows in a white half, nah. Okay you know what I mean. And then we will have the non traditional brownies with sugar daisies on top.

My Mom would always serve ham, broccoli/pea casserole, scalloped potatoes and angel food cake with green coconut on top and jelly beans. Thing was my Mom sorta got to be worse and worse with age when it came to cooking and refused to let any of us take over the cooking so...............besides the ham, well we don't do it the traditional way cuz as her hair got grayer.....so did the food, especially the scalloped potatoes.

We spent the morning enjoying each other and blessing each other with Cascarones, which are confetti filled eggs. The eggs are blown out and the end is then filled with confetti, tape is applied to the end and there ya go. The blessing part comes when you wish something good for the person as you smash the egg on top of their heads. What a big ole mess, I love it. We will be finding confetti dots for months to come.

Luckily,  the wind was blowing so we blessed the neighborhood too. I was especially thrilled that the nasty cigar smoking neighbor next door had his garage door open and the wind was taking the mess his way.....payback is so lovely.

Fun among the flowers.................

This story is a little late. I mean for goodness sake we were there two weeks ago but it was best to let the heat disapate after the sexiness of it all.

I know there is a notion that when there is snow on the roof that the fire isn't very strong in the heater anymore but you couldn't be more wrong. I personally have always appreciated a good looking man and am never embarrassed to enjoy the view (without drooling, mind your manners). And oh golly gosh there was this fabulous looking young man at the nursery where we went to find plants for the new terrarium.

The establishment is Rehm's Nursery and is not but just a hop, skip and jump from The Specialty Shop I reported on last week.

We headed for the house plant greenhouse first and we were met with the nicest woman who really knows her plants. Her name is Madeliene and she showed us all manner of wonders of the plant kingdom. Even let us take a few publicity shots in the green house. That is her hand (she turned down the offer to be in on one of the photos) in the desert rose photo. Headed us in the right direction with mother's fern and the little palm trees and asked us to bring back photos after we finished our terrarium. Sweet woman.

After making our choices we were headed to the cash out after picking up a bag of charcoal for the bottom of the terrarium. Oma also puts charcoal in the bottom of all her indoor plants to keep the water "sweet". That just means that awful rot doesn't occur around the roots. When what to our approving eyes should appear but this gorgeous young man, you know the kind that if you could get away with licking him, you would but you wouldn't want to be arrested for assault? Yep right there up front for all to see. Now mind, he wasn't one of those muscly type but a normal everyday gorgeous guy.

Tried to take my mind off my mind and it's very bad thoughts (or good depending on your perspective) by playing a little game of hiding in the flowers so I could check him out again. Well he caught us and asked what we were doing? If Maddy had not come out of the greenhouse and explain to him that we were doing a bloggie thing and the pictures were for that.............I would have died of embarrassment. Oma asked if he wanted his picture included and damn him he said no. Well this old crone was mighty disappointed and I did have myself quite a sulk when we got back to the office but never you mind.

I'll be back next week with another story of adventure or eating or drooling, it all depends on the whim of the film crew.....silly woman.

Ta, Ms Crone

The Management: Had some computer issues.....like it was down and Comcast while I have cursed their names several times in the past, sent me (Linda) the cutest young drool over repairman. So thanks for the good choice of cuteness Comcast....and he was personalable and fixed the computer lines......a win, win, win for this lady.

A foray into the back yard..............reported by Ms. Baggs

Now these pictures are real. No one was harmed in the making of this blog post and all concerned made it back alive.

This reporter has never experienced an up close viewing of wild animals of the fashion before. I have as you well know seen llamas, horses, donkeys, camels and also chickens. But never had I encountered such a dirty and ominous critter until this week. Oma and GK were grinning and enjoying it very much and wanted me to get into the picture of this beast as well but I declined. I was needless to say, intimidated by the turtle. I'd never seen one before.

Oma explained that he was extremely slow moving because GK had dug him out of his hibernation hole. Shame on her. Everytime she would water in that spot where the hole was starting she could hear a hiss and knew it was one of the boys. And sure enough she was greeted by a young male who, GK did not recognize immediately and Oma would not let her clean him up. Frankly I don't see the charm. Maybe they grow on you but really, look at that dirty face.

The rest of the backyard holds more of the terrors according to GK and she spends her afternoons after school searching for the breathing holes of the coming out of hibernation turtles. If they all survived the very cold spell this last winter, Oma tells me there could be as many as 14 adult turtles in the yard as well as many small dirty faced creatures.

Here are some pictures I was willing to be in. These are of the gardening themed wall hangings and crates on the porch near the swing. Lovely place to rest and oversee the yard and watch your toes, I'm told.

Ta, Ms. Baggs

My daugher and grands tried to do me in......no, really....

Needless to say I am a sedentary old fool for the most part. My legs, my back, my well you get it. I am in pain 97% of the time. So? Fibro and fat have done me in. So most of the time, I miss out on the great adventures that are had by the 3 Musketeers on the weekends. They go hither and yon and I stay home and do arting stuff.

This whole thing started when I told the grands.....sometimes when you and Mom go to the picture show (movies for you who were not influenced by a southern mom), it would be nice if I could go with you. I don't like to butttttt into their time together but then again, whatever. 

Open mouth insert foot. They were off to the flea market and I was in tow. I haven't been to the flea market in fordamnever. I love the beads and jewelry and fresh fruit and veggies and junque. I used to like the people watch too but as I have gotten older, less is more in that department. 

We must have walked 2 miles. Zigging and zagging our way through the booths, alley ways and all. Now that may not sound like a lot for some of you who are fortunate enough to be able to do walking and simple stuff like that....but for me well. The entirety of a Target store can be challenging...so I took my cane and off we went.

I got the only pair of wings I will ever had on a t shirt with a Day of the Dead Dancing lady on the front and silver wings on the back, an Our Lady of Guadalupe woven wall hanging (which Ry is so excited about. That's a story in itself). Ry got another pirate ship and shoes, GK got knee high top converse (knock offs), a crystal necklace and a mini skate board, Sweet Man was the recipient of a Marine Corp ball cap, Shelley got the biggest avocado I have ever seen (great guacamole last night for dinner) and some great stones for woven rings and we all got Frescas de Agua......fruit water. GK-pink lemonade, RyLeigh watermelon, Shelley-horchata (rice water, better than it sounds) and me - coconut.

We got back to the car after 2.5 hours and I swear that I didn't think I was going to be able to lift my leg into the car. Told the kids I was gonna have to drive home with one leg hanging out of the car......GK asked if that was my good leg?

When we got home, I was kinda tired (like alot) but still able to move (sorta). We had lunch and then sat down to watch the Wiz (which I think is cheesy) and about 10 minutes later I couldn't keep my eyes open. Went to nap, I love naps and when I went to get up, I couldn't. I mean I couldn't get up. I hurt everywhere there was a place to hurt. Gave myself some time to struggle to my feet, put dinner on to cook and then crashed again.

I told the kids at dinner last night that they tried to kill me, but this morning, I'm right as rain. So guess what that means?????? Yep, I'm gonna let them try to do me in again this afternoon, we're going to take the little dog for a walk and try to keep this pain and gain thing going on.

A new game to play.............

Like we have time on our hands and nothing else to do right?????

For quite some time now, a few friends on the Blogosphere and I have been playing a strange if not mind boggling game with the idiot verification words that appear on some folks blogs. You know the ones where you sometimes have to type your whole message again because the vert word comes up just as your pressing send?

I have read several mini rants about the verification words being unnecessary and a pain in the butt and yada yada yada. So rather than getting ticked off, we of the stranger than fiction variety humans play this game.

Before you send the message, most of the time you see what the "vert word" will be. It is then your turn to enter in your comment a sentence using the series of letters as a word in a sentence. Sometimes they are actual words and then, as Larry the Cable Guy says,  that's funny, I don't care who you are. Most of the time they are gibberish with a twist. They are the most fun to try to figure out.

Last week I had carlung as one. My sentence was: my car quit running and I took it to the auto repair shop where the guy said it had fatal carlung.

I also had babies on someone whose post had been about a daughter being pregnant. Okay universe I hear ya.

So I am inviting you for the next week, only on my blog (or be adventuresome and start passing it forward to some of you bloggie lovelies who might not think you've gone mad) to use the vert word for fun. You might find out that a pain has become a suduko of the blog.

Have a lovely what's left of the weekend.

Who would you invite to dinner?

One of my all time favs on the blogosphere challenged me to this little bit of fun and frivolity. The lovely and dangerous Dark Mother Goddess.....or dawk mudder as we refer to her, I think she thought I might have some bizarre folks to a dinner partee. Here are the rules (there are always rules, have ya noticed that???).

Choose 6 people, living or dead, that you'd like to invite over for dinner. Choose freely, they can be friends and/or family, famous or infamous people.

All I want from you is a motivation as to why you've chosen these people, both on a personal level as well as what you think the individuals might add to the group. You may also add what you would serve for dinner.

Tag as many or as few people as you like. If you've read this post you've been tagged for the challenge! If you'd like to play also.

Don't forget to let me know in the comments when you're done with the challenge so I can read who you've chosen.

My dinner party would have a theme...much like truth or dare. I would want to be able to ask my guests questions and hope that that would allow the others the opportunity to learn a little something about the others.

First, my Mother Frances Elizabeth West Doss Maes, who passed away in 2002. I didn't know her well and have lots to ask her. I would like to find out who she really was. And secretly I would hope that perhaps she might get a little insight into my true character as well.

Second, Eddie Izzard, who calls himself an executive transvestite. He is a comedian and I just love him. kiss, kiss, hug, hug. I just wish we wore the same size cuz he's got some kick ass clothes. I would want to learn how he has the intestinal fortitude to do what he does so well.

Third, L. Frank Baum, the author of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Really Linda, hmmmmmmm, I wonder why? I have read everything I could get my hands on the subject of this man and I still don't understand how he could have written the stories he did. The man is an enigma. I wonder how he would react to the knowledge that one book in the series of 14 has a huge cult following.

Fourth, Walt Disney. This man was a true visionary and a lover of the fantasical. I wonder how he would react to what has happened to his brain child and how it has impacted not only our culture but that of the entire world.

Fifth, my college friend Melissa Sue Owens. I would love to see what she has been up to and what she did with her life. It would be a true joy.

Sixth, me 30 years ago. I would love to see how naive and untested I was. I wouldn't spoil my optimism with my truth but would love to see what I was like. It would be interesting to view me from the outside. And also to see what other people would think of me.

I think I would like to serve a roast, potatoes, gravy, veggies, homemade rolls and brownies for dessert. Plain food for plain folks.

This particular exercise kept a conversation going with Sweet Man most of today. He has a whole other list going on......dark, broody sort of. I wouldn't even want to be within 10 miles of his party. And frankly my list has changed a bazillion times....the only constant being my Mother and Eddie Izzard. Both sharp dressers.

A sweet trip to The Specialty Shop

We have been quite busy here at YOCG. It's not just the office work but all the trips out to do stories on the business's of interest. Last week we ventured into a store that neither Oma nor Poison had been in previously. Which confidentially was quite obvious from their lack of decorum when it came to shouting from various parts of the store, "oh you gotta see this, and come and see this one".  Quite frankly I was a little embarrassed and so I left the "geese who seemed to be finding a brand new day" at every corner and introduced myself to the manager of "The Specialty Shop".

This establishment has been in business for over 20 years and services the community with all manner of cake, cookie and other yummy treat paraphanalia. They also do fabulous cakes for all occasions and offer classes to those with an interest.

Pat, the manager, offered to show me just a few of the hundreds of tips for decorating cakes, while the "girls" were off shopping and buying and shopping some more. Poison bought a darling pirate inspired cake topper, blue spray color and some piratical rings for Ry's cake (which he wasn't really keen on but no accounting for taste). Oma on the other hand was once again distracted by all things sparkly and shiny. Honestly the woman is like a crow....if it sparkles she's all over it.

Anyway, we came back to the office with a lot of new things to do things with......or something. And Poison will begin her beginning cake decorating class in June. GK will also be doing a cake baking camp for a week in June and I'm gonna be first in line to sample the bring homes. Now that little girl can bake.

So until I regale you with our very sexy trip to the nursery. Whew, fan needed for this one, be good to all the wooden heads you know. For all you know they might be someone's crone.

Ta, Ms. Baggs

The sweetness of my friends and family......

I didn't go into what I had gotten for my birthday last week. Because....well I just didn't. But then I got a package from a dear friend in the Netherlands and I just had to share and let you see what she sent.

Her name is Dawny, she is a gift of love from my bestie Donna of So Dark So Cute fame. I just love this little love bunny. I adore getting toys, it's what I am all about. As though you didn't know that.

The grands went to an Art Auction at their school 2 weeks ago and came home all a twitter about what they had won and how I was going to love, love, love what they had won at the silent auction. And I do.

And then there is the Wizard of Oz metal board that my dear daughter, Poison Mom, found for me at the flea market. I scored big time. When we finish the moving of all the rooms around, I will have a wall near my workbench that will become the wall of OZ.

Can't show you my other giftie because it would spoil some of the fun of Celebrate Oz for 2012. I will give you a hint though......Go team green.

A faery garden under glass......sorta

I'm just enamored of the fae. What's not to love. Whether they are ornery or fluttery, blessed or a blessing, real to you or imagined by others. I have a whole outside garden devoted to my faery friends. Most all of that garden is wild and fanciful. I don't know how to garden any other way. Sometimes the joy is in the interloper winning and the planned being the underdog.

Last years garden was taken over by the sunflower invasion. Many volunteer sunflower seedlings are going to be a problem this year if we don't take action now. We are introducing some new plants, bachelor buttons, pineapple sage, baby's breathe. Then we'll still have woodland violets, allysum, and strawberries, mint and hollyhocks. We added black hollyhocks to the red, white with pink centers and pink.

Everything comes full circle. Years ago when my daughter was a little girl, terrariums were the "in" thing. I had a big water bottle like the kind you put into a water cooler cut about two thirds of the way up. We had the overgrown mess for years and then one of our St. Bernard girls, I think it was Priscilla Inabrat's big ole tail that moved it from the end table and crashed it onto the floor.

Well my darlings, life once again has come almost full circle and we have just planted a new terrarium. This one is in a large cookie jar and is called a fairy garden by the grands. It has mother's fern and bella palms. Some mushrooms, a faery circle and a plastic faery, that RyLeigh insisted we add. This one too is a closed terrarium and we'll see how long it is before replanting and rearranging will be necessary but it sure is fun and interesting now.

Ms. Baggs will post about the adventure to the nursery on Friday along with the photos.....it was a fun time.

This reporters trip to an oldie but a goodie................

Hope this edition of YOCG finds all of you well.

Part of the 5 person road crew, Oma Linda head photog and the map holder/drink carrier/good looking one, Poison Mom took me out to lunch today. The others were off at their real day jobs. I mean we did have office duties to preform but these two are too funny together to miss an opportunity to escape the drudgery of the office, have a laugh and kick up our heels. So we headed to lunch.

Oma Linda pointed the Omamobile, a very cute little orange car, in the direction of an oldie but a goodie drive in restaurant here in metro ABQ. When she and I were in our teens, before there was hair, this place was already well established as one of the three places to troll for good looking guys. Oma regaled us (she is very much like Duckie on NCIS the way she drones on.....poor dear) with tales of picking up boys at Frank's, Mac's and Peter Pan's as a teenager driving on the make......er looking to flirt or pick up boys.....er gathering with fellow teens to hold conversations.

Peter Pan's was razed in the mid 70's and guess what stands there now?????? A Walmart. Frank's went the way of the forgotten and lonely guy places in the 90's and all the Mac's went into bankruptcy, save this one, just two years ago.

As Oma tells it, one always orders a taquita twosome, green chile cheese burger or steak in the rough with a cherry limeade. Poison Mom said, after receiving her drink order of a cherry limeade that she had forgotten how much better Mac's are than say oh.......sonic but you didn't hear it from this reporter.

The Rough, fries, roll, cole slaw, pieces of beef much like a chicken fried steak and the biggest green onion.

Taquita Twosome, seasoned ground beef rolled in a corn tortilla, quick fried, served with salsa and guacamole and chips

Poison Mom, not talking

And an almost totally scarffffffed green chile cheeseburger

I have to tell you.........I fell in love with the cherry limeade, wolfed down my green chili cheeseburger before Oma could even get a picture of it. I got a nibble, that's all I could fit in, of the guacamole served with the Twosome. Yum, burp and then yum again. I'm telling you, if you want a fabulous meal, Mac's Steak in the Rough is the place. This location recently remodeled and everything is wonderful.....and tastes home made. That is if your home has a grill and lots of citrus presses.

My new/old love

We did make it to another story assignment but I'm too full and too tired to report on that adventure today. I'll get that info to you on Monday. Think I'll go look up SJ Bunnifer and see if I can share a little nap time with him.

The Bunnifer at rest

Ta, Ms. Beulah Baggs, head reporter of Ye Olde Crone's Gazette

The office staff of YOCG...................

All of you received Ms. Baggs, our new reporter with such enthusiasm that I thought I'd like to introduce you to some of the other staff members of Ye Olde Crone's Gazette. We're a little weekly right now but who's to know, we might work our way up to being a medium size weekly one day.

Ellie Mae being fooled into being still.......momentarily

Odin, holding the grass down

The Office staff includes: myself, Sunny J. Bunnifur also know as Sunny Bunny BooBoo Head, my personal assistant and chief editor of everything and official keyboard cover, Ms. Ellie Mae Scottles formerly of the Cibola County Scootles, who is an assistant in training. Her main duties are to pee, poop, chase and wrestle with the personal assistant until they are both so exhausted that all is quiet on this western front and finally, Odin the Chupacabra, Espanola, low rider Coyote. The later is only in charge of holding the floor down so that it doesn't get away unless a notorious "brown" delivery truck comes down our street, in which case he springs into action and does his best Don Knotts in the Ghost and Mr. Chicken imitation and runs in circles shaking. We quit asking why about 18 months ago. He just does.

Ms. Baggs introducing herself to S J Bunnifur

My desk assistant and head critic of all that is written here at YOCG is a rather handsome, older gentleman (you see we have a theme going here with older folks). This editor and the head driver on excursions have been at the assistant's beck and call now for going on 12 years. He is a marmalade tabby Manx with a "just now" mellowing personality. I believe it is the children who have settled him down with all the physical attention they give him. Up until they moved in, he was a cat in all cat ways. Now he behaves slightly more like a human's companion cat.

This is my best side

but I'm starving

Sunny loves a good scritch and requires one about every other sentence typed or he gets up on the arm of his assistant chair and paws my arm. If I am intent on what I am doing, he bites me....hard. As you can see by his pictures he is a roguishly handsome dude, even if ill mannered. Sunny Bunny still has kitty attitude in an old cat body. This is even more noticeable since our newest member of the office staff, Ms. Ellie Mae Scottles came on board. You see, our older gentleman fancies himself a bit of a pugilist and at morning, noon, and night time breaks, the younger and stronger asst. just beats the tar out of the older gentleman with the orange hair. C'est la doo doo. Can't make the driver on photo trips stop snoring and can't make the cat stop being an idiot, ya know?

Well my staff is letting me know in all of their annoying and "playful" ways it's time for Oma to get off the computer and attend to their morning feedings.

Hope you enjoyed the introductions to the office staff. I will give you a rundown on the camera and reporters backgrounds, skill sets and other trivia another day.